An Open Letter to My Roommate

An open letter to my roommate (whom was home during the rape, but did not step in):


Although I wish that you had done something to save me, I do not blame you (even though I probably should).

I do not blame you for not realizing that I had been drugged, despite noticing how exceedingly (and dangerously) drunk I appeared.

I do not blame you for not growing concerned once  you noticed that I wasn’t wearing any pants (in addition to the previous realization, especially considering that I am normally a very modest person).

I do not blame you for not asking if I was okay.

I do not blame you for leaving me crying and hyperventilating on the kitchen floor afterwards.

Nor do I blame you for not calling the police.


Although, I do blame you for never asking if I was okay in the days and months following.

And, I do blame you for not being a friend in the days and months following.

You had become my best friend, and I one of yours over the time we had lived together. I needed you after I had been raped, and you were no where to be found. Nor did you care.


You selfish fucking asshole.


8 thoughts on “An Open Letter to My Roommate

  1. I am so very sorry to read this. When trusted friends should have your back. I’m just so very sorry!

    I truly wish I had been there. There are some guys who would have protected you and made sure you were okay.

    This makes me angry. There are some of us who would want to protect and care for you as if you were our mothers or our sisters.

    I’m just so very sorry you had such an experience.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thank you so much for that. I was worried that my message would have caused you pain and was hoping it wasn’t inappropriate. I’ve been beating myself up all night about it. All I want to do is help as much as I can. If this was helpful, then I’m glad I sent it.

    I wish you a deep sense of peace and healing. Just think of me as a new fan whose routing for you!

    Be Well, My Friend

    Liked by 1 person

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